( The insistence is reflexive. She's spent too many years regretting what she never said for it to be anything else. And there's that knot in her stomach again, the one which isn't filled with guilt, the same one which seems to cling to her heart. It flares up every time he smiles, is enough to make her eyes flick away from his face to anything else - the walls, their hands...
She wonders if it is too fast to feel these things, if there's a minimum amount of time people are supposed to spend dating before things like this blossom. But Hadriel is all too good at making things progress too quickly, because Hadriel shifts constantly. She's trusted, liked and lost many people. Disappeared and returned. Fought and pushed through the way this city changes and the things which have happened to them.
She's done much of it with him at her side, as a friend and more. )
I love you.
( The words spill from her lips before she can bite them back, reconsider or overthink them. They spill forward through the memories of the last time she saw her brother and all the things she should have said or done then, and the ache of waking up in Hadriel in a bed which shouldn't have been empty but for her and all the things she didn't say then. )
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 09:35 pm (UTC)( The insistence is reflexive. She's spent too many years regretting what she never said for it to be anything else. And there's that knot in her stomach again, the one which isn't filled with guilt, the same one which seems to cling to her heart. It flares up every time he smiles, is enough to make her eyes flick away from his face to anything else - the walls, their hands...
She wonders if it is too fast to feel these things, if there's a minimum amount of time people are supposed to spend dating before things like this blossom. But Hadriel is all too good at making things progress too quickly, because Hadriel shifts constantly. She's trusted, liked and lost many people. Disappeared and returned. Fought and pushed through the way this city changes and the things which have happened to them.
She's done much of it with him at her side, as a friend and more. )
I love you.
( The words spill from her lips before she can bite them back, reconsider or overthink them. They spill forward through the memories of the last time she saw her brother and all the things she should have said or done then, and the ache of waking up in Hadriel in a bed which shouldn't have been empty but for her and all the things she didn't say then. )